Cleaning with the Kids

Son, 3, Mopping

Am I the only one trying to get the house clean every week by myself? To vacuum, mop, shampoo carpets, wash windows, etc. The list goes on and on. So this week, I decided to recruit some help. I can't afford to hire anyone, so I used who I have around all day: the kids.

Daughter, 4, Vacuuming

Did I bribe them? Nope. Reward them with candy? Not a piece. So how did I do it? I asked them nicely. I informed them that mommy can't clean the entire house by herself and mommy can't do any fun stuff until the house is clean. Also, it takes teamwork to get things done faster. For some reason, they listened and were eager to help.

The kids have chore charts that they get stickers on and it was the first time they almost filled it. It was amazing. The kids are only 3 and 4, but really, they can almost do everything I can. They can vacuum, but its too heavy for them to push around. That's quite alright. This is a great way to let them be part of the family and teach them responsibility.

A few things kids can do:
Wash windows (sliding glass doors)
Mop
Dust
Wipe counters/cabinets

Good luck with your new inexpensive hired help. What a great way to get your house clean for Thanksgiving and teach your little ones how to help without yelling or scolding!

Look at all those stickers!

LA Area

The Los Angeles/Disneyland trip was amazing! I was very hesitant to go, but once we got there, it turned out to be the best vacation with the kids. I figured Disneyland would be overcrowded, dirty, and unwelcoming. It actually turned out to be quite the opposite.

We got our hotel for 50% off, which saved us $100 per night. Thank God! Our meals when first going there were within walking distance and we never had to eat fast food for breakfast since our hotel provided it. I love how the kids can pick whatever they want to eat, even though its usually pancakes...

Disneyland was extremely clean, super friendly (especially to the kids), and was barely crowded. I didn't take any meals, snacks, water, etc. I took my phone and my wallet. Once I got there, people had backpacks, strollers (which had to be parked in a lot of areas), and were still able to go on the rides. This is much different than what I'm use to. Most parks have the "no lose items" rule such as sunglasses, hats, flip flops, etc. Of course, we didn't go on any huge roller coasters as a family since the kids are only 3 and 4.

Since there weren't too many people, we got to ride most of the rides. The lines were primarily 5-15 minutes for the majority. Keep in mind we went beginning of November. School and the cool weather is in session. We were lucky enough to get 75 degree days until the day we left.

After the Disneyland and Adventure park, we decided we would check out a couple other places as well. I wanted to stop at a National Forest or Park, but since it rained during our last day, we decided to postpone that idea. I'm not sure how, but hubby found the Fullerton Arboretum at the state college (CSU Fullerton). It has 26 acres of botanical gardens with each section being dedicated to different regions of the world. Their regions included:

Cultivated Region (fruits, garden)
Woodlands (Conifers, Palms, Redwoods, Cycads, Etc.)
Mediterranean (Chaparral, Channel islands) as much as California can get
Desert (Cacti and Succulents ) This was my favorite!
Children's Garden (The kids absolutely loved this area)

We spent a good deal of time there with the kids not wanting to walk. There's also a little museum (with kids activities) and gift shop there too. It was a great free thing to do with the kids.

We also stopped for lunch and Ikea. I forgot I wanted to go to The Container Store in LA, but completely forgot. However, hubby stopped at Ikea and I did get to look at a small drawer cabinet that I've had my eye on!

It was a wonderful trip overall and I cannot wait to go back! I hope next time we can afford to get multi-day tickets to really enjoy the rides and take our time. Now that I know you can take food and backpacks into Disney, it'll be a better planned trip next time. If you do go, wear some good walking shoes!

Thanks for reading!

Can preschoolers be grateful?

The kids broke their train table. Apparently it wasn't important enough to take care of it. So my lesson for next week? They will have no toys. They will have no movies, tv, or games. I realize they are only 3 and 4, but I know my daughter will do anything to please her little brother. I'm not here to entertain them 24/7. I've already lost my sanity and cannot wait for the free 8 hour overcrowded babysitting service called public school. Will it work? Will absolutely no toys teach my kids to be grateful for what they have?

I've got a lot of projects going on around the house. Filing, cleaning kitchen cabinets, starting a new diet, keeping the house clean, etc. Plus entertaining children. Why not? Seems like I do this everyday. Nonstop- even when hubby is home. I'm so bored as a SAHM, but I seriously cannot get a job (even with my college degree). So I'm stuck at home with a 3 and 4 year old pulling my hair out and grinding my teeth.

My son pulled out his dresser drawers last week. This week he and his sister broke the train table. This makes me wonder what they will break next week?

They've already gotten into the board games in the living room. At 8am, the living room is spotless (other than needing vacuumed). By noon, the living room is covered in game board pieces. I ask them to pick it up in thirty minutes before lunch. The rule is if they don't pick up, they don't eat. I'm not a clean freak, but after I clean the house, I expect it to stay clean for at least one day. That's apparently too much to ask for. Their thirty minutes fly by and they are wrestling each other on and off the sofa. Without much complaining, there was still some, they marched off to their rooms or at least in that general direction. Without lunch.

I'm not one of those moms who sits on the floor with them and plays with them all morning. I did that for their first two years of life. They aren't babies anymore. They want to get up and move-which is absolutely fine! Go ahead! Go outside and run around! But don't expect me to hold their hands every step of the way. I've got a house to clean, meals to cook, and laundry to wash. They can entertain themselves. I don't have the car most days, so they are usually playing outside (and getting into mommy and daddy's stuff although it is put away) or inside, tearing up the house (after I just cleaned it). My hair is literally starting to fall out by itself around noon everyday.

This morning the kids actually helped me clean. They attempted vacuuming the hallway which was very sweet of them. Then they fought over who's turn it was before they realized it was too heavy to push. My daughter helped me pick up the bathroom floor (since it was mostly her clothes). They helped this morning, then decided to pester mommy for a snack. Why do they think I always have snacks and meals ready to eat whenever they get hungry? You don't know how many times I want to tell them to make something themselves. I can't though. My daughter will literally try to cook something.

Last night they cleaned their room with Daddy, which was fantastic. However, today at naptime, I heard them playing, so I yelled at them to go to sleep. Forty-five minutes later, I hear crack. I get up (filing is today's project) and walk through the house to find both kids in my son's room with his clean socks and underwear all over his floor. He informs me that sister helped him put his socks on. Great. I just hope he doesn't pee all over his clean clothes.

If I could go back in time, I would do a lot of things over. This is not what I wanted to do with my life. I'm so frustrated all the time, I can't get a job anywhere, and have added spanking to my hobbies apparently. That'll look great on my resume. I'm not that great at actually doing anything, let alone being a good mother. I've learned to accept and actually be grateful for what I do have in life. I know my husband and kids love me no matter what and yet I keep trudging through this life because its the only one I'll ever get.

The kids will be in school soon enough and life will get better. I hope next week will teach them to appreciate what they have in this world without toys, movies, or games.

~Thanks for reading this frustrated mom's post~

Love Crazy Bako

Bakersfield, California. It’s not the number one destination to visit or relocate, but for thousands of people, its home. I haven’t lived here all my life, nor a decade. I’ve lived in the great San Joaquin valley merely three years and counting. 

My husband, hired for a government position, had one week to move from Omaha the last week in November. Although the winter is definitely worth living here, the summer makes me wish I were back in Omaha.

I sit here writing this as the 101 degrees fries my brown and yellow lawn as well as my garden. The leaves on my fruit trees are beginning to wither and the tomatoes in the garden are waiting impatiently for more water. Although this heat fluctuates about ten degrees each day, I’m more than glad that I’m not pregnant or have a manual labor job.

I gladly (well, sometimes not so much) stay at home with my kids (2 and 4) before they start school. L, my 4 year old daughter, has one more year of staying at home with mommy before heading off to kindergarten. “What about preschool?” I ask my school district “Can you test her and see if she’s ready for kindergarten?” “What the heck am I suppose to do with her?!” Apparently, there is no public preschool here in Bakersfield. There’s head start for low-income families and private/church preschools ($2,000/year). I was in shock when I saw the price. How can I afford that on an one income paycheck?! Plus, if I were to get a job, I’d have to buy another car, gas, insurance, DAY CARE, etc. for my diapered 2 year old. What boy is potty trained by age 2? You have superman/woman skills if you’re little boy is potty trained by 2.

When I first moved here, I couldn’t stand it. Hubby was gone for his job one week out of every month. The nearest park was a mile away and our neighbors ran inside if we opened our front door. Seriously. Nevertheless, after going through being homesick and depression, I met some neighbors and a couple friends that helped me make it through my journey of three + years here. Plus, a supportive husband always helps too!

Since we’ve been out here, not only our bills tripled, but also the gas prices. All because California’s cars are required to have special smog-reducing engines that have gas additives in our gas-which is why gas is more expensive here. Stupid additives. You would think the San Joaquin Valley would have fresh, clean air year round. Right? Wrong. We have the worst smog filled valley in the world (I haven’t researched this, but I think its true). My solution: build a tunnel through the mountains to the coast. Let the coast air in and blow the smog away. The state decided not to do this because it would cost trillions of dollars. Hmm… California is already more than broke and let’s have those San Joaquin Valley residents suffer for living in the valley. No wonder our healthcare costs increase every year. 

Like I said, I hated driving cross country with a three month old and one year old. We got to stop at Painted Desert, the Grand Canyon (not for too long), and my grandparents house for a day- thank God! It’s hard for little ones to sit for so long. And when we actually got to Bakersfield that first night, our in-laws drove their motorhome down to see us. They live five hours north of Bakersfield, so it was nice seeing someone we knew! 

It took time to figure out Bakersfield when I had free time (apparently that’s most of the day) and the only car. The NW is suburbs primarily, the SW is suburbs and nicer shopping, the NE is redneck country, and the SE is no habla Ingles. Downtown Bakersfield is a nice little area with a few antique stores, shopping, and restaurants. I haven’t been to many stores or restaurants down there since I hate taking the kids where they can’t touch anything. As for the restaurants, Tina Marie’s is decent breakfast/lunch and Mariscos Mexican (near Art Museum) is really good (the kids love their grilled fish)!

Here in Bakersfield, I’ve come to love the winters the most. NO SNOW! There is a frost, but nothing ice hard like Omaha had every year. We can actually have a winter garden (which is awesome) and a summer garden. I tend to stay indoors in the blistering summer and do the majority of outdoor work in the spring season. My oldest half-brother’s mom told me (since she lives north in the valley) there are only two seasons in the valley: spring and summer. How very true.

I also love the fact that we can have fruit trees. We planted peach, orange, lemon, avocado, pomegranate, pear, olive, and lime. The pear tree, olive tree, and grapes grew all by themselves. Fresh pears are growing and will be ready soon. The grapes are growing wild and are slowly ripening daily. As for the olive tree, I’m hoping it’s not a fruitless variety (after doing some research, there are several olive varieties that are fruitless).  Other than that, the other trees have been slow growers, and we have to look at a cinder block fence on two of the three backyard fences. I’m trying to do some research on what grows well here. I want to create a luscious, easy-growing, edible landscape that we can afford on one income.

I know you’re wondering if we’ve been to Disneyland yet. The answer is: who the heck can afford going there?!  I want to go to CarsLand so bad, but I need to get a job! Hubby and I would like to go on a cruise, visit Hawaii or Alaska, or even go on a honeymoon, but while on one income, we’re lucky if we can pay our bills each month. He’s been trying to get another job elsewhere, even though I’ve come to love Bako other than the smog.

We found the almost-perfect house, close to decent shopping, in a good school district, and close to a new park! Plus, they have their swimming lessons two miles away-I’m going to start walking there as soon as the road and railway construction is completed. Where else could I find all this? I feel lucky and blessed to have found such a great home. Like the town slogan says “A great *cough* place to *cough* live.” (They don’t actually have the *coughs*)

P.S.  We’ve met some very nice neighbors. Most of them homeschool their children and live on one income as well. 

Hubby makes just enough to pay the bills, so when extra bills come in (like the dog’s teeth cleaning) it sets us back a bit. I would love to be able to have an additional income and stay at home with the kids (as they go into school), but it seems impossible. I have a photography business with absolutely no customers and I bake/decorate cakes (illegal to sell food from home). I also love to bake from scratch/ trying to clear my home of preservatives. 

I enjoy doing many things. I’m not exceptionally good at one thing, so I’ll just have to keep experimenting until I can find something that sticks. I love reading, gardening, baking, photographing, having a clean home, traveling, and a black comma in my banking accounts (which is very rare).